The weather was always nice when she went; she didn't want to think of her child in some dreary place. It was bad enough that her mind constantly dwelled on the idea that the physical body - a body that had yet to fully form - as in the damp ground. If she had to push away the dreary rain or storming, she wasn't sure even her unwavering faith could over come it.
For in her life Vera had learned the meaning of her name better than anyone she knew. She had learned to have faith. Faith that somehow something better would come out of it all. She had faith that whatever had happened, why ever that had, had to happen, her first child was in a better place.
Now she had to have faith that this child, her third, would turn out just fine. She had been strictly told she wasn't allowed to stress about it; stressing would only cause more harm. Though it was hard not to get stuck in a loop, hard not to dwell then panic and then dwell all over again.
"Morning, angel," the woman cooed softly, in a sad but kind sort of voice she only ever reserved for this. Kneeling in the soft grass found before the stone Vera took a moment to compose herself before she continued speaking, "I'm sorry I have not been here in a long while. I hope you haven't been too lonely."
There were moments when she felt insane for talking to a piece of rock. Moments when she was completely convinced that whatever was going to turn into her child had disappeared, essence and all the day that Noel had smashed it out of her, but then she realized how much she needed this. The world could be whatever way it truly was, but Vera needed to believe that there was something more. She needed something to hold on to her sanity.
"I have some news for you; you're going to have a little brother or sister soon. I know- I know we did this once before, and it didn't work out so great then but this time-" she swallowed, hand rested upon the soft mound growing on her. It was just barely noticeable to the touch now. When she moved her hand over it, she could feel the curve to it. "But this time's going to be different. I promise. This time, we're going to grow up, and be as perfectly wonderful as I knew you could have been. I promise. This time I'm going to do it right."
Head hanging slightly, she stopped talking then, having said all that she needed to say. In the silence there as only enough room for the warm summer breeze to whistle passed her, wrapping around her in an embraces before moving on to other lands, other people who needed a comforting touch.
"Mommy loves you. Both of you."
For in her life Vera had learned the meaning of her name better than anyone she knew. She had learned to have faith. Faith that somehow something better would come out of it all. She had faith that whatever had happened, why ever that had, had to happen, her first child was in a better place.
Now she had to have faith that this child, her third, would turn out just fine. She had been strictly told she wasn't allowed to stress about it; stressing would only cause more harm. Though it was hard not to get stuck in a loop, hard not to dwell then panic and then dwell all over again.
"Morning, angel," the woman cooed softly, in a sad but kind sort of voice she only ever reserved for this. Kneeling in the soft grass found before the stone Vera took a moment to compose herself before she continued speaking, "I'm sorry I have not been here in a long while. I hope you haven't been too lonely."
There were moments when she felt insane for talking to a piece of rock. Moments when she was completely convinced that whatever was going to turn into her child had disappeared, essence and all the day that Noel had smashed it out of her, but then she realized how much she needed this. The world could be whatever way it truly was, but Vera needed to believe that there was something more. She needed something to hold on to her sanity.
"I have some news for you; you're going to have a little brother or sister soon. I know- I know we did this once before, and it didn't work out so great then but this time-" she swallowed, hand rested upon the soft mound growing on her. It was just barely noticeable to the touch now. When she moved her hand over it, she could feel the curve to it. "But this time's going to be different. I promise. This time, we're going to grow up, and be as perfectly wonderful as I knew you could have been. I promise. This time I'm going to do it right."
Head hanging slightly, she stopped talking then, having said all that she needed to say. In the silence there as only enough room for the warm summer breeze to whistle passed her, wrapping around her in an embraces before moving on to other lands, other people who needed a comforting touch.
"Mommy loves you. Both of you."
Wed May 21, 2014 2:20 am by Guest
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