For Lack of Reason Not To || OPEN

It was the middle of the night. Most of the world were asleep in their beds, but not Lainey. Lainey wasn't tired. Lainey was horribly depressed - worse than she had been in years.

There was a lot she ought to have grateful for, of course, much that should have buoyed her spirits. She had found the group she'd been searching for, Exodus 22. She had a place to live - grungy though it was - and finances enough to support her frugal lifestyle.

Lainey didn't feel like she had much to offer the order, however. Her own ability was of no use unless she actually touched a wizard and despite her hard work, learning normal means of defense was far more difficult than she had anticipated. She'd nearly shot one of her new teammates - and she still couldn't figure out how.

Work had been exceptionally difficult that day. Lainey had been chastised for something that wasn't even her fault. If she got another warning, she'd be fired. She couldn't get a better job - she didn't have the qualifications, let alone the education.

Worst of all, as always, was the fact she was still alone. Her parents were gone. Eli, too, was likely dead to her, one way or another.

The wizards had taken everything from her. She was nothing; had nothing.

Lainey found herself looking out over the quiet lake, the water black in the darkness. No one was around. Her hand had found its way to her pocket, and she withdrew it, pocket knife held in her fingers. She pulled out the blade. It gleamed in the light of a distant lamppost.

Who would even miss you when you're gone? a voice inside her head taunted. You're nothing - nothing but an abomination. That's why they're gone, Lainey. Because of you. Because you're cursed.

The redhead nodded, tears stinging her eyes. It was all true, of course. She'd had many years to think on it, after all.

Lainey could feel the persistent beating of her heart against her ribcage. It hurt. She hurt, in ways she couldn't even fully describe. And Lainey just wished she could go back to being nine-years-old again. She couldn't, of course. Never again. So, next, she just wished it would all stop.

That, she had some control over.

Staring for moment at the inside of her left wrist, Lainey firmly gripped the knife with her right hand. Then, she drew a line of crimson across the pale flesh.

Gene whistled as he headed down with his fishing equipment, and he halted, seeing someone at his fishing spot, and he walked over to her, and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Miss... Everything alright? Wait, it's you! And why did you cut yourself?" He said, recognising the lady and he slapped the knife away, and took out her bottle of cold water and splashed it across her face.

"WAKE UP! WHY ARE YOU CUTTING YOURSELF? There are things to live for!"

Lainey sputtered as the cold water hit her, clasping her now empty hand over her bleeding wrist, more out a need to cover up what she had done than out of self-preservation.

"You again!" she snarled, though, it wasn't nearly as effective as she'd meant it to be. Already, she was feeling light-headed and weak. In fact, her legs buckled beneath her.

"What do you know of my life?" she demanded. "What do you want from me? I won't go back - I'd rather die!" The girl laughed, though it wasn't a mirthful sound, but a hopeless one.

"I won't go back," she insisted, weakly trying to pull away from him.



(OOC: ... did you touch me? I'd think it would be kinda hard to slap the knife away otherwise, so unless you're wearing gloves, the moment your skin touched mine, your magic got temporarily stolen)

(OOC: Dude... He came to fish... Naturally he'll be wearing gloves to get a tighter grip on his rod? You don't fish much? )

Gene was stumped by her rudeness but he merely shrugged.

"Yes... We do seem to bump into each other very much. Pray lady. Do not cut yourself..?" He took out his wand and mended her broken skin, and clicked his tongue sympathetically.

"Yes, I know nothing about your life. But I do know, for one, you were about to do some stupid stupid things. Two, I bet you're not married and understood the meaning of having a family for yourself. Reason enough?" He raised his eyebrow and he took out a bottle of scotch, and offered it to her.

"Come. Let's talk. Treat me like a muggle. Pray. I act like one also."

Lainey stared down at the unblemished flesh on her wrist. There wasn't even any proof... She eyed the bottle he extended towards her, then shook her head - which succeeded in making her feel a bit dizzy. She elected to stay where she was on the ground.

"I might not have ever been married," Lainey murmured quietly, her Welsh accent thicker than it usually was, "but I had a family, as a girl." Her tone turned bitter and she shot him a glare. "They were stolen from me."

"Pray. You never know. I never knew I would get married and have a child... A child that would have to depart the world just months... after... she was born and named." He said sadly, but he smiled again.

"But life goes on! Faithless is he who says FAREWELL when the road darkens... Please seriously... Just sit down... I am not about to kill you with magic. I am a man of peace but to the very depths of my soul."

"I know wizards killed your family. Guess who killed mine?" He smiled.

Lainey looked up at the man, dismay and grief written across her features. So, the blackened hole in the ground... her parents had been killed, after all.

"And my brother?" she demanded, voice choked with anger and heartache and tears, deaf to his query regarding the loss of his own family. "Was he murdered as well? What? He wouldn't accept that he was one of you, so you killed him?

"I won't do what you ask of me. No matter what you do to me, I won't be your lab rat, again."

"Wait. Sorry miss... You're losing me a little. I have no idea what you are talking about." He asked, slightly confused.

"Oh... So your parents weren't killed by wizards? Then why the hate for wizards? Anyway, my child was killed by muggles." He said, waving his hand, and picked up his fishing rod, and checked the bait.

"What lab rat? The last lab rat I used was when I was in a muggle University... Pray. What's your name?"

"If you don't know, then, why do you keep following me?" Lainey fairly shouted. Her vision tunneled momentarily in her excitement - blood loss could do that to a person. "I don't know what happened to them - there was nothing but a blackened hole where our house used to stand!"

She started to cry from a mixture of exhaustion and weakness, grief and hopelessness. "Why are you playing this game with me?" she wanted to know. "You already have me - it's not like I can escape." Lainey didn't bother to tell him her name. It was obvious to her that he must know, already.

"I have no idea what you are going on about, I am afraid. I only assumed your family was killed by wizards because uhh... You hate my kind of folks?" He said, completely confused.

"Seriously. What is your name?"

Lainey felt raw and vulnerable - she'd felt that way before the wizard had arrived and he was making her feel worse. Too weary to even continue crying, let alone resist playing along with him.

"Lainey," she answered, then amended tiredly, "Elaine, but it doesn't matter." She drew her legs to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, laying her cheek against her knee, making a rather despondent image silhouetted by the distant lamppost. It really didn't matter.

"Okay. Lainey. I am Gene. What is making you so upset? Come let's just talk." He smiled kindly, and cast the line into the lake, sitting back a little, looking at the girl.

Lainey laughed, again without mirth or humor. It should have been far too cynical a sound for one still so young. "Upset. I suppose that's one way to put it.

"Well, Gene," she said, her tone more weary than anything else. "Despite what you might otherwise insist, life is meaningless. I have nothing. I am nothing - nothing but some sort of freak abomination. I don't fit anywhere. But I'm sure the people you work for already told you that or something like it."

"Life is amazing. If you don't try to kill me of course. I work for Hogwarts and am my own master. Listen, I am not interested in doing anything to you unless you try to uh... Do me in first."

"What's so bad about life?" He asked.

Lainey lifted her head a bit to gaze at him skeptically. The more she listened to this wizard the more she wondered if he really didn't know anything about her.

"I don't know what Hogwarts is," she murmured.

The girl laid back on the grass, knees still bent. She loosely gripped her left wrist in her right hand, idly stroking the now unbroken skin with her thumb.

"What's so good about it?" she countered. "You really think I'd try to off myself if my life was 'amazing'? Sorry, but some of us have lives that aren't so charming. Some of us have already lost everything good." Lainey stared up at the sky, idly picking out constellations. Eli was the first person to point them out to her. Her heart clenched.

"Do you really know nothing about me?" she asked. If he didn't know of her, there's no way he'd know of her brother. "The term 'leach' doesn't mean anything?"

"A school for wizarding folk... Nevermind that. Hmm... Life is good if you know what to do. You look aimless to me anyway. What do you like to do other than killing my sort of people? How about studying?" He asked.

"Muggle school of course."

"Leech you mean? Like those in the forest which sucks blood?"

Lainey shot him a glare. "I don't like killing anyone," she growled, her irritation making her feel a bit less listless. "I just happen to take great exception to some sick, lecherous wizard thinking he can come make sport of me and leave me for dead.

"I'm a waitress in a cafe, if you must know. I don't have money for school."

The girl studied him for a moment. "I could show you," she said, turning her gaze back to the sky. "It'd be easier to show you, but you'd have to let me touch you." She still lay sprawled on the ground. She saw no reason to move, however, as it wasn't uncomfortable. There was no way the wizard would let her touch him, which was just as well. She didn't want his ruddy magic, anyway.

"Hmm..? Why not like... Study instead..? I'd be happy to sponsor if you have an interest in chemistry... I need people in those sectors. Oh wait. If you're interested in accountancy too... I'd sponsor you to school." He asked, genuinely curious.

"Take a fishing rod and shake my hand." He smiled, pulling out his glove.

Lainey frowned thoughtfully. "I'm not sure I'm smart enough to be a chemist, and accounting never really interested me," she mused aloud. "I don't know what I want to do, really. I've never thought about it..."

The redhead raised up onto her elbows, the better to gawk incredulously at him. He was seriously going to let her touch him! Sitting up the rest of the way, she slowly reached out to take his hand with hers. Instantly, she felt the power wash over her, tempting her, seducing her, begging to be used. None of the magicals she had previously met ever noticed that she'd taken their magic until they tried to use it. Lainey felt it, every time.

Sighing, she turned her attention to the streetlamp, stretching a hand out towards it. It exploded in a burst of sparks. Slowly, she rose to her feet, her mind whirling. Then, she thrust an arm out towards the wizard.

"I could you forget about me," she said. "I've done it before. You've met me so many times, I don't know what it would do to your mind. Maybe nothing; maybe a lot. I could make you forget me, though - give me one reason why I shouldn't!" She swayed slightly, already spent, despite having used only so little of her borrowed power. Erasing Gene's memory would use up the rest of what little energy she still possessed. It might even render her unconscious, entirely, but the thought of a wizard who knew her secret, knew what she was, wandering around, able to reveal it to anyone else, terrified her.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't just wipe myself from your mind!" she repeated, arm trembling with the effort of holding it in the air for so long.

She just wanted everything to stop. To stop being afraid; stop feeling so lost; stop missing her family. Lainey wanted to stop hurting. Gene knew about her ability, now. That information could hurt her more. Still, she hesitated. Still, she asked for a reason not to steal that information from him with his own magic.

"One reason..? Hmm... Here fish with me." He held out a fishing rod for her, and laid it on the ground, before sitting back on the small chair he had brought with him, and sat there, looking at the setting sun.

"You know... Maybe you should become a counsellor as a job. Then, you will meet others who have had led worst lives than you. But you'll need to study for psychology though." He said, smiling, and started whistling, like a good old muggle.

"Interesting right? Fishing...? You got anything on your side?"

(OOC: Dude, it's the middle of the night. >.-)


Lainey stared at him bewilderedly. finally lowering her out-stretched arm, she sank to her hands and knees. "You are mad," she declared shakily. "You are mad. You are mad. You are mad."

The moon had finally risen, now reflecting off the water of the lake. "What do you know of my life? Nothing." Another horrible, humorless laugh escaped her lips. "You know nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

"'We just want you to light the candle for us, Elaine.' 'We're just going to do a little experiment, Elaine.' Two years! Nothing but walls and doors and experiments for two years! I was nine when your kind took my brother and me. I never saw him or my parents again. Know what happened in the nine years after I escaped, Gene? Take a guess, you're so clever. What do you think a girl had to do to survive on the streets for nine years?

"Take a guess!" Lainey slumped as the magic left as suddenly as it had came, leaving her weaker than she'd been already. Tears slid freely down her cheeks in the dark. She made no move towards the fishing pole.

"Take a guess, wizard," the girl repeated. "Then, you tell me how wonderful my life has been. You tell me why I have no reason to distrust and hate your kind."

"I understand. But you think that those nuts generally reflect my kind? I am part of a power who are attempting to serve justice on behalf of all of you. Let's face facts and be honest. Your guns and grenades won't make ten metres of a well-trained wizard with a wand. Imagine yourself shooting me another day, all I need to do is apparate and go somewhere else to shop for grocery. Your brother. What is his name? I have connections. I can help. But you must allow me to."

(OOC: YOU CAN FISH ANYTIME OF THE DAY!!!)

"You know... As you put it, "YOUR KIND" killed my child. A little baby girl. But apparently, I have not grabbed my wand and cursed muggles or your folks into oblivion. Hate is un-necessary. But... Seriously, to be honest with you, I lead a largely muggle life. When people can summon things from one room to the other, I prefer walking to get it. When people can apparate from place to place, I prefer driving to it, or flying by planes."

"No, I don't want to guess what you have been through. Because what I say will only be a gross understatement. But I've seen enough of the world to know that the term horrendous is an understatement."

"If you want to study, my foundation can help. No strings attached. But you must work for me when you are done. No worries... It's only counting money or teaching, depending on what you want to do."

(OOC: I know. I was referring to the setting sun in the middle of the night - not the fishing! )


Lainey sighed. "His name was Eli..." She hesitated, cautious more out of habit than a present need for self-preservation. "Eli Patterson. He... he's older than I am, so he's in his twenties."

Green eyes studied him speculatively. "You'd be well within your rights to do so," the redhead opined. She rolled over to lay on her back once more, letting her eyelids fall shut.

"There is no help for me," Lainey said. "I'm not one of your sort; I'm not really normal. Even if I studied, I have no idea what I'd want to do, or even what I'd be good at. Acting, maybe. Lying - you get good at that.

"I just want it all to stop. Why interfere?"